I recently looked at some face creams and treatments that promised to make me more beautiful and less wrinkly. The asking price was nearly $1000. I was attracted to the promise of a more youthful visage.
It got me thinking what was driving my attraction? If I am more “beautiful” with less wrinkles, what then? Do I get more compliments, more sex, do I feel better? Does it take $1000 worth of wrinkle treatment for me to “feel” better?
You see, I can’t see my face. Unless I look into a mirror, my face is completely hidden to me. BUT everyone else sees my face. So, the premise goes.... how my face looks affects what everyone else sees and thinks about me.
And we all want to be liked right? So there lies the appeal of a youthful visage, to look more beautiful, the assumption is we will be more liked, loved, wanted, accepted, approved of, admired... all in a pot of cream for $1000. No wonder people buy it, but what you are really buying is a story.
I once met a lady heading for 100 years who was one of the most beautiful people I have ever met. She could whistle like an angel and was a fighter for good causes. We sat in the sun and she and told me her philosophy on life. Her eyes twinkled with life and joy. Her inner beauty transcended her stooped figure, wrinkles, grey hair, her shaky hands. She was a delight and a lesson that true beauty is an inner quality that transcends all outer appearances. We all recognise true beauty when we see it, but it is not something that fits a definition, because truth and beauty are uniquely individual.
We all know “beautiful people” we avoid because of their ugly personalities. So being beautiful on the outside is not automatically going to deliver you happiness and love. And a good thing too, as physical beauty is a fleeting thing!
So pots of creams, the wraps, the clothes, the house, the car, are external things sold on hope and the “unstated” premise that this accessory will win you what you already possess, love, approval, appreciation, recognition, security. It really is a scam of the most outrageous proportions.
We lust after external things because we are seeking feelings, internally. But looking for them in the external world is an unfulfilling quest, because it is never ending.
Could I just feel good about myself even though I have wrinkles, spots and blemishes? Absolutely yes. Will people avoid me, dismiss me, reject me if I look old? Absolutely not. Yet the beauty industry is worth globally thousands of billions of dollars. It trades on our insecurity.
Don’t get me wrong I love my face creams, make up and the way I feel when I dress up. But I don’t buy the story. I am not less if I look my age. I am not fighting my age. I accept my age, embrace it, love it. I earned it!
Have you ever noticed there appear to be two worlds? The one inside you and the one outside you? What I feel about myself, my life, my world, depends on what I think internally. This is an insider’s game. If I think I am beautiful, then I am.
All the things we seek externally, love, admiration, approval, acceptance, security, respect and recognition, are the things we lack internally. Finding a way to them from within is critical to fulfilment and happiness that doesn’t end when the pills or potions do.
When the sales woman asked me what I was worried about, wrinkles? I answered “No, not wrinkles, my wrinkles were being taken care of by my failing eyesight!” What I was really after was something that would make my sensitive aging skin “feel” nice in our very dry and cold climate. If the $1000 cream does that, then I will buy it knowing what I am really buying into.
If you are on a path of finding happiness from your internal world, then 4me2realize can help you on your journey.
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"Be the change you want to see in the world." Mahatma Gandhi
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