Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Bringing Peace to the Life Balance War

Life Balance is such a trendy term at the moment. We are supposed to be able to balance our work and our life somehow. This dualistic approach tends to turn life and work into competing forces fighting over you. I don’t like this idea and living it is hell!

So how to avoid it? Add another element.

Doesn’t this mean there is more competing interests for you. No, because the third element is YOU!

Adding you, means you devote as much energy to yourself as you would to your work or any other area of your life, like you wife, girlfriend, family, friends, sports or hobbies.

When you devote the appropriate amount of time to developing yourself, everything benefits.

I prefer this more peaceful triology of work, life and self in balance, each complimenting the other in a meaningful and beautiful dance through life. And notice what a balanced life looks like? A peace symbol. Coincidence or not, it has a nice feel about it.

When you find yourself between these three areas the result is a more peaceful, aligned life.

In today’s busy world, it seems the first casualty is our personal peace, time to think, contemplate and be considered. Work and life seem to keep their share, funny that! You can blame the world, or you can step up and take responsibility, at least for yourself, by taking time to develop yourself.

When I imagine a highly evolved person, I think of monks on mountaintops. People who spend a lot of their time on their own, developing their inner self first.

We don’t have to become monks! But just a nudge of more time for yourself can be restorative.

4me2realize creates an environment where you are guided through a process of self analysis and then integrates and encourages contemplation and review. Rather than sending you to mountain tops, it uses modern software. But the result is the same, time for you and peace in your life.

How much time for yourself? Well it just depends, on you. But I know I am better if I take at least an hour for myself every day! And that’s not at the gym or in front of the TV! For some people, just 15 minutes a day is a great start.

Warning, as you start the habit of taking time for yourself, it becomes addictive. As you improve yourself, the world around you also improves. It is a wonderful, self perpetuating spiral. It feels great.

It doesn’t matter how much money you make, how old or young you are, what your job or relationships are, you can start right now, today on improving yourself. You need nothing but time and commitment.

So where do you start once you have found a few minutes and the will? I of course am going to suggest you try 4me2realize.

And right now you can try it for free for 60 days. That’s enough time to start a really good habit and get on the path of self improvement.

Peace be with you

Kind regards


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

The Truth Shop a modern fairytale

I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw the name of the shop: THE TRUTH SHOP.

The salesgirl was very polite: What type of truth did I wish to purchase, partial or whole?

The whole truth, of course. No deceptions for me, no defences, no rationalizations. I wanted my truth plain and unadulterated. She waved me on to another side of the store.

The salesman there pointed to the price tag. "The price is very high, sir," he said. "What is it?" I asked, determined to get the whole truth, no matter what it cost. "Your security, sir," he answered.

I came away with a heavy heart. I still need the safety of my unquestioned beliefs.

And so the story goes.... but what does it all mean? Well, have you tried the truth test?

If something is true, it is true for everyone.

The temperature is 27 degrees is true. But only right here, right now, for me only, give me a minute and it is no longer true!....arg Truth can be a tricky, slippery little customer....

“You have to work hard to get ahead,” is not true. Our heads are full of beliefs that we dress up as truths. Why? These truths (belief systems) give us security! That is why we hold on to them sooooo tightly.

They were given to us before we ever asked for them or knew what they were. They are like unasked for gifts of dubious quality. They come from parents and teachers and childhood experiences. They create our patterns of thinking and behaviour. We have become accustomed, comfortable, dependable and familiar with them because they make us feel safe.
“ A tooth for a tooth, and eye for an eye.”

“Only nice people get good things,”

“ You can never get enough.”

“I am never good enough”

But because they are beliefs, they are just creations in our heads. I can create any truth (belief) in my head. And I can change and choose what to believe.

With this understanding, “The truth,” morphs into something resembling a heat haze on the horizon. It looks substantial, like life giving water, but when you get there, it is nothing!

You can change what is true for you any day you want, but the price is security. To get something new, you must give up the old to make space for the new.

To test the truth of anything ask yourself, “if this is true, is it true for everyone?” This is your “truth-from-belief” filter. A very useful tool!
When something is not true for everyone, you have a belief. Celebrate. You have the freedom to change and choose.

This will work wonders when people start a sentence saying “Honestly.... blah blah blah”
When they dress up their beliefs as absolute truth (no names mentioned)... To throw them off, simply say, “if that was true, it would be true for everyone, and that is not true for me. I appreciate and hear your opinion, (call it what it is) and I understand this is TRUE FOR YOU....but I have another perspective, would you like to listen?”

If the answer is no, move on! Not everyone is ready to pay the full price for getting to the truth on truth ie letting go of their truth (insert belief)!
Hope that helps.

Love always on the journey

Photographic acknowledgment

Artist's Comments
we blind ourselves,

when it stands before our eyes,

for it is often easier

to cradle our daily lies
How awesome is that!

Get to the truth of what your life is about using 4me2realize....

All these principles are incorporated in 4me2realize.

Why not try it now, click here to try it now? 4me2realize 60 Days FREE TRIAL

And if you order now you’ll get 3 months of free on-line support and a year of FREE upgrades.

Kind regards

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Connection, the ultimate gift to yourself.

A few weeks ago I wrote about defining your Life Purpose in response to some Realizers who struggled with the very first question, “What is your Life Purpose?”

I want to cover another aspect of this important, first, momentous step. The importance of which was brought home to me one early rainy Sunday morning when I wandered down through wet paddocks, to our remote brown river with a very good friend, stripped off and swam and talked nakedly about the importance of connection to one’s self...a fitting spiritual start to the day’s divinity. First I want to assure you... you already know what your Life Purpose is, at some level, you know. Your whole brain, body, heart and soul and every experience you have ever had up to now, has defined your Life Purpose. You know what it is, it is inside you. You were created out of the dust of the universe to achieve Your Life Purpose. If that’s too cosmic for you, think of it as your God given Purpose.

The problem is in our “busy” world you might not have ever consciously sought it out. To find it, you have to reconnect with yourself. This connection is tricky, especially in today’s noisy world. In some ways we spend our whole lives trying to connect with our inner selves and to know ourselves truly. It is no accident that Anthony Robbins starts his signature Unleash the Power Within event with the stated outcome “Know thy self!” Hardly original, but as true and relevant today as it was 2000 years ago!

To know yourself you have to have some connection with yourself. I imagine your life is a lot like mine. I juggle many responsibilities, there is a never ending demand on my time and attention, the phone is ringing, there are constant SMS and email messages demanding an instant response. People have expectations of me and rely on me for their living.

There is always a pile of washing, grass to be cut and houses to be cleaned. There is television, radio news in the car, DVD’s, You Tube and a million other distractions. How the hell to cut through all this stuff and get connected to yourself? Connecting with yourself almost seems like another unrealistic demand in an already overwhelmed world...

  1. Value yourself. Your are worth it. You deserve it
  2. Make Time. Make some space. Come up for air.
  3. Understand everything benefits from giving time to yourself.
Recognise that contemplative time for yourself is as important as time with your partner or time at work. The others all suffer if you are measly with yourself.
To find your Life Purpose is to free yourself, to allow you to be True to thyself, and allow your inner light to shine. There is a noble purpose to this exercise that reaches far beyond yourself and to the universe as you unlock the gifts and talents you have to give...which makes it very satisfying.
In your decisions lies your destiny. Decide now that the self is central and take action on that priority. If you don’t have a Life Purpose then you haven’t done it yet...
Timothy Ferriss wote The 4-Hour Work Week, which became a NY #1 best seller. In it he says “Are you inventing things to do to avoid the important?”
“Being busy is often used as a guise for avoiding a few critically important but uncomfortable actions.” Ask yourself, am I hiding behind busyness?
Sometimes creating a Life Purpose may make you uncomfortable. You sit staring at the blank page or screen, looking at far away vistas while searching desperately for the true internal self. You squirm.
It is far easier to turn on the TV, go and eat something, do something else, like clean the house, or send an email, surf the internet.

David Whyte’s Book “The Three Marriages” describes knowing the self as “the most difficult marriage of all” the other two being with our partner and work.

“All of our great contemplative traditions advocate the necessity for silence in an individual life; first, for gaining a sense of discernment amid the noise and haste, second, as a basic building block of individual happiness, and third, to let this other all-seeing identity (ourselves) come to life and find it’s voice inside us.....It can be disconcerting or even distressing to find....this internal marriage (with ourself) calls for a kind of cessation, a stopping, a fierce form of attention that attempts to look at where all this DOING arises from. For the busy mind, for instance, it is almost impossible or even painful.”
Mr Whyte’s vocation as a poet makes his writing lyrical as he recognises our universal struggle to identify and connect with our true voice.
No amount of software can help you uncover your Life Purpose. Time and contemplation, stillness and “fierce attention” are the keys. So turn off the TV, radio, computer, phone, go to the park or the paddock, the river or the beach, go to the mountain or into the forest. Listen to beautiful music or silence. But hold fast to your desire to find your shining light within, to call it a name, to define it and live by your true nature.

Once you know what your Life Purpose is, 4me2realize will help you align everything you do with it. From that point on life becomes a lot easier. You may even find you do less and have more. You are less busy because you are more focused on a clearly defined Purpose. You will have the gift of empowering clarity. It is the antidote to a busy life, a fulfilled life.
 Tough it may be, worthwhile it is.

I like Timothy Ferriss description of laziness “to endure a non-ideal existence and let circumstances or others decide life for you....”

All these principles are incorporated in 4me2realize.

Why not try it now, click here to try it now? 4me2realize 60 Days FREE TRIAL

And if you order now you’ll get 3 months of free on-line support and a year of FREE upgrades.

Kind regards